Fear has been the big theme of my week. My mother tells me that my grandmother is weakening and I should try to come one last time. In my inimitable way, I’ve found a zillion reasons not to. The bottom line is that I’m afraid — of weakening her more, of breaking down my own resolve to let her go peacefully, of witnessing death. Reality sucks and my defense is to avoid it. I’ve done a great job these past two days. No stars in my crown.
But tomorrow is Saturday and I have no excuse. I need to go, maybe more for my mother than anyone else — she is tired and sad and deserves the support of both her kids, not just my brother.
Molly’s post deals with dealing with fear and conquering it. I’ve really admired her from afar, just from reading her books and hearing her keynote speech at this year’s Web Essentials ‘05, but this post reveals her own very personal and LONG struggle with chronic illness and fear. Amazing. Thanks, Molly for the inspiration and kick in the butt.
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