Via Liz, a link to an article entitled “Overcoming Fear of the Ordinary”.
On average kids and pushy parents:
Parents are so nervous. If their child is doing well in everything it’s like a badge for them that everything is OK. If their child is, God forbid, average, they panic. … Teachers are afraid that if they give anything less than an A, parents will blame their child’s poor achievement on the teacher’s lack of skill rather than on the child’s natural limitations. This is a shame, because real problems get glossed over or missed until fourth grade, when there’s no more hiding it and the child’s weaker areas show up on standardized tests.
This addresses the parents who think their child should be an “A” student even if they don’t master the material because they need their kid to be an “A” student to reassure themselves that the future is solid. There are some of those, I’m sure, but what I see more often is parents who want to be sure their child is learning what they need to get along in adult life. If teachers are afraid to give less than an “A”, that seems to me to be a reflection on the teacher more than the parent. Besides, I’ve rarely run into any teacher who is afraid to give less than an “A”…in my experience exactly the opposite is true for the most mediocre of reasons.
Children don’t need the “best of everything”.
In order to flourish, children don’t need the best of everything. Instead they simply need what is good enough. This may include good enough (but dull) homework assignments, good enough (but a little crabby or uninspired) teachers, good enough (although insect- infested and humid) summer camps, and good enough (although bossy and shallow) friends. The Spellathon can be a success without being very, very special. Isabel can feel appreciated without hosannas. Consider that “good enough” can often be best for children, because when life is a bit mundane they won’t end up with expectations of themselves and those around them that can’t be met on this worldly plane.
What about kids who are by nature achievers? Should they also be subject to “good enough (but dull) homework assignments” because if it’s good enough for the average it’s good enough for them? Crabby, uninspired teachers because it’s good enough for most of the kids? What about that keeps them loving to learn?
If we accept this approach as the norm, we are ignoring the group of kids with the most potential to achieve now and in the future. This as wrong. Every child has a unique gift, whether it’s learning or social skills or athletics or music or crafts or whatever, and those gifts should be worth “the best” and not just merely “good enough”.
Technorati Tags: mediocrity, excellence
