Insurers’ Special Holiday Recipe, Just For You

by Karoli on November 27, 2009 · 8 comments

If you follow me on Twitter, you know I was vying for my dream job. This was my writing sample. I didn’t get the job, so figured I’d share this special recipe with you all instead.

Joe Lieberman is dead wrong when he says it’s better not to have health care reform than it would be to include a public option. It’s a message packed with lies and distortions written by the tobacco industry 15 years ago, delivered with the full blessing of insurance lobbyists cooking up Big Tobacco’s 1994 recipe for 2009 reform.

It’s no coincidence that Lieberman represents (and I use the term loosely) a state where many insurance companies have regional or home offices. It’s not a surprise that he would stand in opposition to anything that might force insurers to actually compete in a fair market.

The surprise is the way mainstream media reports his grandstand plays. Is there no one reporting the news with a memory extending beyond what happened last month? The insurance lobby playbook they’re using today was written in 1993. They think they have a recipe for success, and they’re using it with the same ingredients, right down to this week’s statement from the Business Roundtable that health care reform is bad for business.


Here’s their recipe, secret sauce included:

  1. One person to spin lies with just a whiff of faux certitude. Enter Betsy McCaughey, lobbyists’ dream shill, who delivers death panels at a low, low price.
  2. Whip up grass roots resentment with carefully orchestrated PR, including random soda tax commercials, lots of American flags, and a targeted populist message. Enter Americans for Prosperity and Dick Armey, where anyone can get on the bus to ‘get their country’ back. Add a generous dollop of ignorance and hysteria for extra flavor.
  3. Carefully fund key Senators. Encourage them to delay the process while publicly claiming they want health care reform, too.
  4. While Senators stew, drop a generous helping of message control into a separate media bowl. Whip it with many Sunday talk show mixers until it’s carefully blended to an even consistency. Apply across the gamut with a broad brush.
  5. Bake at a high temperature for 90-120 days before turning out of committee and into Congress. Reserve a few representatives before serving.
  6. Be careful not to let hope and momentum rise too high. As a precaution blend William Kristol with a cup of pre-packaged messages about burdensome costs and government takeovers.
  7. Whip all to frenzy, serve to public. Voilà! Another health care reform bill successfully done…in.

It couldn’t hurt to find a recipe to cure mainstream media editors and reporters of their short-sightedness and willingness to repeat the lie without exposing it, too. Every little bit helps.

Photo: MaggieMuddPhotography (Flickr)

  • jamesbarclay

    Nice but perhaps your recipe was a little too vitriolic for potential employers' tastebuds? Personally, i thought it was great and am left wondering which company turned it down??!!

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  • HangInThere

    Your limited view of the past and history is taking you down a self destructive path for this wonderful nation of ours. The argument against government run business started when the constitution was written. Perhaps your potential employer had insight to avoid your rehtoric. Perhaps theres' something bigger here than the tobacco industry pulling a fast one on weak smokers… Perhaps people here have put their hope in something much bigger and more successful that Big Government. Those who have lived under Big Government understand why we shouldn't go down the road you're proposing. Perhaps you should look at other options available to you and your family than breaking the bank of our unique country. Perhaps there's another, better way . . . Perhaps you should try a path to help you find it.

  • http://www.drumsnwhistles.com/ Karoli

    no, it wasn't the content. there were just tons of qualified candidates for them to choose.

  • http://www.drumsnwhistles.com/ Karoli

    Corporate motives are always the bottom line, by definition. If you're good with being a balance sheet item, then more power to ya. Personally, I'll opt for the power base where I have at least a small something to say about it.

  • Bottom Lines aren't Always Bad

    You are a line item with the Government now… You are their source of Revenue… The Government does not look at the Bottom Line, it's running in the Red now… Government Run Medicare and Medicaid operate in the Red now…. You will be contributing to a slush fund that will be used for health insurance as well as other things like it does now… You will be obligated under legislation to pay your tax that will rise with no guarantee that your specific illnesses will be covered… The Government Run Health Insurance will undercut private insurances… Private Businesses do have to watch their Bottom Line to stay in Business… Government doesn't have to and is capable of bankrupting our nation as it is doing now… Once Government Run Health Insurance is compulsory with laws that will not be sympathetic to your personal situation you will have to supplement with what you have left over with private insurance causing your personal Bottom Line to be strained even more than it is now…. At best the Government Run Health Insurance will cover basic care that you will be paying a premium for through your tax dollars…. I know people from Canada, Italy, Australia, Hungary. They understand how your proposal works and they adamantly say NO to your solution…. They understand you think you're getting something that is different than what this will be…. That's why they are here… Bottom Lines are a good thing…. Family Budgets operate on them…. Small businesses run on them… Even Fortune 500 Companies run on Bottom Lines…. Many of them offer wondrful products world wide for all levels of consumers…. Yes there are those at the top who benefit excessively financially, but the world wide population benefits from affordable products that would otherwise be very expensive and unavailable for consumption in some regions… There's more than the side of evil to Bottom Lines…

  • Bottom Lines aren't Always Bad

    You are a line item with the Government now… You are their source of Revenue… The Government does not look at the Bottom Line, it's running in the Red now… Government Run Medicare and Medicaid operate in the Red now…. You will be contributing to a slush fund that will be used for health insurance as well as other things like it does now… You will be obligated under legislation to pay your tax that will rise with no guarantee that your specific illnesses will be covered… The Government Run Health Insurance will undercut private insurances… Private Businesses do have to watch their Bottom Line to stay in Business… Government doesn't have to and is capable of bankrupting our nation as it is doing now… Once Government Run Health Insurance is compulsory with laws that will not be sympathetic to your personal situation you will have to supplement with what you have left over with private insurance causing your personal Bottom Line to be strained even more than it is now…. At best the Government Run Health Insurance will cover basic care that you will be paying a premium for through your tax dollars…. I know people from Canada, Italy, Australia, Hungary. They understand how your proposal works and they adamantly say NO to your solution…. They understand you think you're getting something that is different than what this will be…. That's why they are here… Bottom Lines are a good thing…. Family Budgets operate on them…. Small businesses run on them… Even Fortune 500 Companies run on Bottom Lines…. Many of them offer wondrful products world wide for all levels of consumers…. Yes there are those at the top who benefit excessively financially, but the world wide population benefits from affordable products that would otherwise be very expensive and unavailable for consumption in some regions… There's more than the side of evil to Bottom Lines…

  • Bottom Lines aren't Always Bad

    You are a line item with the Government now… You are their source of Revenue… The Government does not look at the Bottom Line, it's running in the Red now… Government Run Medicare and Medicaid operate in the Red now…. You will be contributing to a slush fund that will be used for health insurance as well as other things like it does now… You will be obligated under legislation to pay your tax that will rise with no guarantee that your specific illnesses will be covered… The Government Run Health Insurance will undercut private insurances… Private Businesses do have to watch their Bottom Line to stay in Business… Government doesn't have to and is capable of bankrupting our nation as it is doing now… Once Government Run Health Insurance is compulsory with laws that will not be sympathetic to your personal situation you will have to supplement with what you have left over with private insurance causing your personal Bottom Line to be strained even more than it is now…. At best the Government Run Health Insurance will cover basic care that you will be paying a premium for through your tax dollars…. I know people from Canada, Italy, Australia, Hungary. They understand how your proposal works and they adamantly say NO to your solution…. They understand you think you're getting something that is different than what this will be…. That's why they are here… Bottom Lines are a good thing…. Family Budgets operate on them…. Small businesses run on them… Even Fortune 500 Companies run on Bottom Lines…. Many of them offer wondrful products world wide for all levels of consumers…. Yes there are those at the top who benefit excessively financially, but the world wide population benefits from affordable products that would otherwise be very expensive and unavailable for consumption in some regions… There's more than the side of evil to Bottom Lines…

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